Inconsequential Concourse

Redirect!

2009-04-15T07:50:15Z

If you visit this blog through a bookmark please redirect to disoriented.tumblr.com - if I ever update on the LJ it will appear as a link on my tumblr, so you won't miss out.

If you visit this blog through my friends page, feel free to bookmark my tumblr. I am not sure how often I will update LJ, as linking stuff via tumblr is a lot easier.

I'll still be keeping a track of people through my friends page, but if you also have a tumblr page feel free to follow me on tumblr, and let me know so I can follow you too!

Reinvention

2009-04-15T00:36:49Z

This blog is really quite under utilised.

I'm open to suggestions, what more can I do with this blog? I will keep posting about me like I have been every now and then, but these times are few and far between.

Should I start a series of informationals like hunter006 ? Or should I post links like Solace (which I already do on facebook)?

Maybe I should switch to a tumblr like Solace, that seems closer to what I do that LJ?

What are your thoughts, what would you like to see me do with this blog?

P.S.

Check out my tumblr here: disoriented.tumblr.com

God Save The Queen!

2009-04-03T21:21:27Z

April Fool's!

2009-04-01T21:30:40Z

My April Fool's joke for today:

One reaction:
Friend: what ur pulling is worst than if you had told ur friend you were going to her wedding and didnt..
Friend: *smack*
Me: lol
Me: I didn't say it was me
Me: I said guess who
Me: it's not my fault everyone is guessing wrong!
Friend: you even ended it with a sad face..
Friend: *shakes head*
Me: I am legitimately sad that someone out there is looking for work agian
Me: =(
Friend: oh marcus lol

Yes, I am a bastard. =)

The technicalities:
I had email and facebook up on my second monitor and anytime someone posted a comment that might have given away the joke (generally involving the terms april fool's in the comment, or just comments which seemed out of place), I deleted them. So there were a lot more replies, but I removed them because they might have given them away.

One friend even commented (after I deleted two of her comments) "Hey, ppl's comments are getting deleted. I didn't know you could do that.". Her comment was promptly deleted.

A couple of people called/texted me, a couple of people pinged me on office communicator/msn. One friend even pinged another friend to ask what had happened instead of me, who was clearly online.

Thanks to hunter006 for being in on the joke and playing along. It evolved in the early morning while we (or at least I) was gearing up at work. I had originally thought of making the status "got laid off again..." but though that would be a bit too on the button, and evolved it into its slightly more ambiguous final form.

Best April Fool's joke I've played in awhile.

Oh, the irony...

2009-03-25T20:19:47Z

... so for those of you who haven't heard yet, I am still in Seattle. I found a job in the nick of time (two days before my work visa expired and I had to transfer to a different visa). Where, you ask?

I am a full time employee of... Microsoft.

Yep. That's right. I was rehired by a different group.

Oh, the irony.

In Memoriam: Ruth Phung 1917-2009

2009-02-13T18:32:07Z

I got a phone call this morning at about 7:43am (Seattle time). It was about 11:43pm in KL, Malaysia. Malaysian phone number. It was my Father. The call I had been dreading and expecting for the past week or so had come. My Grandmother (Nana) had passed away.

I had gotten the first text on Sunday night. "Nana is sick", my father had said. "I am flying back to KL as soon as possible, as is your Uncle and Aunt (one of my aunts lives in KL). Do you want to come back and see her?" I can't, I told him. After all, I had gotten laid off only two weeks ago. With my Visa status stable only because I was on administrative leave, and with a tiny but promising amount of job leads which required interviews, how could I afford to leave? I expressed my guilt to my father - I wanted to go back to see her, I really did, but now was not the time for me to leave the US. "Everything might still be ok," he replied. "I will go back and keep you updated."

Tuesday night I got a text from my Mother. She and my Father are divorced but she still keeps in touch with my Uncle. She forwarded me a text from my Uncle "Not sure how long she will last" it said. He was not able to get to KL til Monday. My Aunt was arriving Friday (my father was arriving Thursday). I called my Uncle (in Scotland). My Grandmother was terminally ill - she had contracted pneumonia, and was not strong enough to recover. She was unconscious most of the time, and the Doctors couldn't even give a time period - she could pass any day now. He wasn't sure if he could make it back in time, and even if he was in time, he could only stay for a week. If she passed or the funeral was after that week, he couldn't be there - he couldn't take any more time off. I told him my situation. "Don't worry about it," he said. "Nana wouldn't have wanted you to come back - she has had a long and full life, and your career and future is more important at this point." I couldn't even speak to her. She hasn't been able to talk on the phone for awhile. "Call your cousin," he suggested. "I just spoke to her and asked her to hug Nana and tell her I love her, and I will be back as soon as I can. That is all we can do at this point, except to keep her in our prayers."

I called my cousin straight after and told her what was happening. "Don't worry about it," she said. "Nana is unconscious and doesn't really know who is around anyway." What about the funeral? "You need to take care of yourself first. I will hug Nana for you and tell her you love her, and tell her you wanted to come see her but you couldn't. In the meantime, keep her in your prayers - that's all you can do." She or my Uncle must have spoken to my Father afterwards, because I got a text from him an hour later saying not to worry about coming back, as we had discussed.

With absolution from my Father, Uncle and Cousin, I went about my daily life (or what was left of it since I got laid off) without worrying about going back to Malaysia.

Nana has been my only living grandparent since I was born. All my other grandparents had passed long before I came into the world. As a result, I've always been very close to Nana. My Mother, Father and Uncle think that I was one of her favourites (she has many grandchildren).

A headmistress in an English medium school in Malaysia, and an English teacher before that, Nana spoke nothing but perfect Queen's English. Before I moved to Australia we would visit her often. After we moved to Australia she would come stay with us for 6 months or more every two years. She would help me with my English homework and give me extra English work on top of that. In fact, she is largely responsible for why my accent doesn't really sound like other Australians - I have Australian influence to be sure, but my formative years were instructed by Nana and her Queen's English. And of course my parents, who spoke Malaysian English. We would watch TV and play chess and read books. As an only child, she was, in my younger days, my best friend.

Even in her 70s and 80s she was sharp as a tack - she was doing yoga, studying three or four languages, learning poetry, learning Chinese calligraphy. Her body may have been frail, but her mind and hearing were as clear as ever. An extraordinary lady by any standards.

As I grew older we started to drift apart a little - though we were still close. It was getting harder and harder to relate to her, and, of course, I had more things on my mind. She started to get frailer and frailer, until she couldn't travel alone anymore. At this point, she stopped coming to Australia. I still went back to Malaysia every couple of years and visited her then, but of course it was not the same.

Every time I saw her she looked smaller and smaller - or maybe it was because I was getting bigger? Then, after all those years, her mind started to go. That stalwart institution, the thing which had long defined my grandmother in my - and other people's - mind. It was harder for her to talk on the phone, she was having trouble remember names and who people were. The two people she did remember a lot were my Uncle and me. And then it happened. My Uncle went back to see her and she couldn't recognise him. It's ok we said, she's getting old, we said. But it was never the same after that.

I went back and saw her right before I came to Seattle. We had a huge reunion for her 90th birthday. The last time I saw her she was fine. She had trouble remembering words but she could still remember people. Letters were easier for her to read and communicate through than the phone. I went and saw her with my Mother (my Father wasn't there yet), and gave her a picture of me and my parents from my graduation. She could recognise the people in the picture, and was very happy to have it. It took her over an hour and a half to realise that the people in the picture were the same as the people sitting in front of her. She couldn't really recognise me til she did that, no matter what we said. She realised she knew me, but she couldn't remember who I was. That was one of the hardest meetings I've ever had with my Nana.

We had a huge reunion for her birthday. She is the eldest child of 12 brothers and sisters. Amazing when you think about it. Her eldest daughter is a couple of years older than her youngest sister. She looked happy. In fact the photos here are taken from that trip - the one with her children from the 90th birthday dinner, the one with me from when I gave her the graduation picture. My Uncle, who had been visiting her every year since she was unable to travel, said it was the happiest she's been in a long time.

And so, I went along my way and I moved to Seattle. My Mother would call me and every now and then ask me to call my Grandmother. I staunchly refused. I didn't want to talk to her or see her as she was - I wanted to keep my memories of her as the Nana I knew in my youth. My Mother understood that, but would encourage me to talk to her all the same. Then I heard things had gotten to the point where she couldn't even talk on the phone any more. That became a part of my excuse. "She'll still be able to hear your voice and she'll be happy to hear from you," my Mother said. Sure, but I wouldn't be after talking to her. Selfish of me? Yes. But can you blame me?

When she got sick my Mother told me to call her. Even if she can't talk back, she can hear your voice. If you don't do it you'll regret it, she said. But by then it was too late. Nana was floating in and out of unconsciousness. I couldn't talk to her on the phone if I tried. All that was left was to ask my cousin to hug her for me.

And now she is gone. And I can't even go back for the funeral. Do I regret not speaking to her in her final years? A little - what grandchild or child would not regret not spending more time with their grandparent/parent after they pass. But she has led a full and happy life (she would have been 92 this year), and she is surrounded by people who love her. I am not there in person, but I am there in spirit. Still, the guilt nags at me that I am not going back for her funeral. I have been absolved of this by my Father, Uncle and cousin, but the guilt is there all the same. She was the only grandparent I have ever known, and I did not speak to her for the last year and a half of her life. And now I can't go back for her funeral. Selfish of me? Yes. Would she have wanted me to come back? I would like to think, considering the circumstances, no. That might be the selfishness speaking, but Nana would forgive me. She was always a very forgiving person - it was one of her many shining qualities.

Rest in peace, Nana. And please forgive me.

Pie Jesu
Qui tollis peccata mundi
Dona eis requiem
Agnus Dei
Dona eis requiem sempiternam

From D, to everyone else.

2009-01-30T17:16:27Z

"2009-01-29

You know you're special..

The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

* I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!

* What I create will be with you in mind.

* It’ll be done sometime this year (2009)

* You have no clue what it’s going to be. It may be something written, some physical thing made, could be anything at all, but I will make it myself. It’s entirely my choice what it is. No quibbles, no refunds.

* I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you put this in your blog as well. If you don’t.. You don’t get anything. Spread the love, people. Happy fuzzy chainmail via blogs. :)

(Please don't comment your address - I'll email you privately to it so I can post your something to you.)"

Feel better D!

Conversation of the Week

2009-01-24T19:25:41Z

So a friend of mine messages me on MSN on Thursday, a couple of hours after I got laid off:

Friend: So, still got a job?
Me: No actually, I just got laid off.
Me: And I'm not joking.
Friend: ... Shit, I was joking!
Me: *Awkwarrrrrrrrd*

So...

2009-01-24T00:50:36Z

... I got laid off yesterday.

What a day.

Where does all that time go?

2009-01-13T18:03:51Z

In my case, martial arts. So at the end of every year, all my various martial arts groups take a break for a few weeks for the various holidays and the inevitable coming of the new year. In the past I have always taken this as an enjoyable break from an otherwise busy schedule of training, but I don't think I ever realised until this year how much time I spend training martial arts.

A typical week will see me spending 6.5 actually on the floor of the dojo - including the extra time you need to have to get ready for training, then packing up after, let's say that's about 10 hours. Then include travel time, I spent at least 12 hours a week in martial arts related activities. 12 hours may not seem like much (only half a day), but trust me - when you don't train for three or so weeks, you start to feel it.

I was sitting at home those three weeks and I had so much free time I don't think I really knew what to do with myself. But the scary thing (at least to me) is, I'm not sure whether I prefer having all that free time or not... It felt good not having to train. And I'm finding it hard to get my mindset back into training. What does that mean for me as a self-proclaimed/considered martial artist?

Hair!

2009-01-11T06:14:30Z

Farewell 2008, We Barely Knew Ye...

2009-01-01T23:44:55Z

So welcome to 2009... With the advent of a new year it's been about a year and a half since I've moved from Perth to Seattle. Overall the year has been pretty good, I guess. There've been ups and downs here and there, but hey, that's life, right?

My life in Seattle pretty much consists of work, martial arts, eating and hanging out with friends (though less than I used to, I'm not feeling very active nowadays - more on that later). My life in Perth pretty much consisted of... work, martial arts, eating and hanging out with friends. Nice to see that things have changed a lot. =D

I seem to have caught some kind of disease here... And as far as I know, there's no known cure (yet). The disease is called a "work ethic". I know. What's up with that? I get into work around 8:30 - 9:00 am nowadays, and more and more often I've leaving around 6:00 pm - sometimes later. A far cry from my in at 7:30 am out by 3:30 pm - at the latest 4:00 pm - days back home. The main difference? I kind of enjoy my job here. Back in Perth? Hated it.

And just as I realise I'm actually enjoying the work I do here in Seattle, come the rumours of 10-17% layoffs. I can't catch a break can I? (Who am I kidding, my whole working life so far has been catching one big break after another. Two international companies on my resume? One being the largest software company in the world? However, that still doesn't count for much in an economic crisis where most if not all large companies are in a hiring freeze as well as laying off workers.)

So while I'm trying my best not to worry about it (after all, they're only rumours, right?), I can't help but think about what would happen if I did get laid off. I guess I'd have to move back to Perth, at least temporarily. Would I stay there? I don't think I could. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and my friends there, but I just don't think I could stay in Perth anymore. Good for a holiday, great to go back for training with my old martial arts buddies, but I just couldn't do it. If I had to live in Australia, I would probably go for Melbourne - but I don't think I could stay in Australia. I'm over Australia, did that for a good 18 years or so of my life - time to move on.

So what would I do? Don't know. Hopefully it won't come to that, and the rumours remain rumours. Hell, I'd be willing to give up bonus and pay rise for a year or so if it would keep me employed. Cities/places I would try to get jobs in if I got laid off:
- Seattle, WA, USA: I would try to stay here, I'm not really done with this city yet.
- New York, NY, USA: City of my dreams. Maybe not a long term move, but I'd love to work and live there for at least 6 months or so. However if I'm getting laid off by MS, chances of me getting a job there?
- London, UK: Hey, Europe! Hey, currency which is actually strong! Hey same chances as getting a job in NY!
- Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia: Home sweet home... Mmmm, Malaysian food... And family! And sun! If there's one thing I hate about Seattle it's the lack of sunshine.
- Singapore: Close enough to Malaysia.

Of course, you take what you can get. But those are some of the places I would look at applying for jobs. Notice how most of those places have decent English speaking populations so it would make it easier for me to settle. Anyway, enough of that. I won't get laid off. Seriously. *Fingers crossed*

Oh, the active thing. So there's not as much sunlight in Seattle as there is in other parts of the world - particularly compared to what I'm used to in sunshiny Australia. Hell, it's a common joke here that summer it's our two weeks of sunshine in July, and then we're done. I've been feeling rather lethargic lately. Sure I go to work, I do my martial arts and I go out and eat. But when people call me out to bars etc, or to hang out, it's tough for me to get motivated to go do it. Anyone who knows me from Perth, or from when I first moved to Seattle knows that this is not really like me - I'm usually ready and rearing to go. Turns out there's this thing in Seattle (some of my friends have experienced it, same lethargy etc - and they're from Texas or other sunshiny places) where the lack of sunlight gives a lot of people a Vitamin D deficiency, which leads to lethargy and people generally not feeling down, but feeling inactive. They've been to doctors and have had to take Vitamin D boosters to get their Vitamin D in their body back up to normal levels (it's usually severely low), and then take Vitamin D regularly for "maintenance". I suspect I am experiencing these effects. I should go see a doctor to do something about it - but I have no GP here, I haven't been to a doctor since I moved here (hell I haven't been sick since I moved here... I used to get sick all the time in Australia, what the hell?). I should go find once I guess.

Anyway, enough of this contemplating. Come on 2009! Show me what you've got! If you're the same as 2008, I can deal with that. But here's hoping you're better than!

Rumours Blow

2008-12-31T01:34:28Z

There are rumours that there are going to be layoffs to the tune of 10-17% in mid-January.

Where these cuts come from are debated by said rumours. Some say that divisions/groups are being cut as opposed to individuals, while some say individuals. Some say that 10-17%, but from MS offices around the world as opposed to here in the US. Some just say the bottom 10-17% of low performing individuals will be cut (which means I could be in big trouble - my last review had me in that range, though my review comments indicated this was because I had not much work to do in the first six months I was here and that I was fully expected to perform above that in my next review). Some people are just denying the rumours outright and saying the "cuts" will be made just from not backfilling natural attrition or in other places.

Either way these are still rumours - however it doesn't improve morale here, and is making many people (including me) worried for their jobs. I can't afford to pay to move all my shit back to Australia. Personally I am more than happy to not get a raise and bonus next year, provided I have a job.

The execs should just come out and confirm or deny - even if they confirm there will be layoffs, it's better than letting the employees sit here and stew. Two to three weeks of this? I'm going to die. Something to talk to my boss about in my next 1-1.

Damn you!

2008-12-02T19:18:14Z

Damn you K-Spice for giving me the gaming bug again! *shakes fist*

The Quality of Honour

2008-11-18T00:59:14Z

At what point does loyalty cease to become honourable and turn into stupidity? There are many qualities which may aptly describe a person of good character or an honourable person, and loyalty is often considered one them. But when loyalty starts to be damaging to a person, or even hold a person back, does that become stupidity? After all it only becomes damaging to yourself.

I'm not talking treachery or treason here.

Consider the following... As many of you know, I study three martial arts. Iaido, Jodo, and Tai Chi. My previous (relatively recent) training schedule was as follows:
Tuesday: Iaido (Formal class)
Friday: Jodo (Formal class)
Saturday: Tai Chi (Formal class), Iaido (Free practice/Informal class)

Jodo and Tai Chi also run a formal class on Tuesdays. My Jodo teacher has long expressed his desire to have me train twice a week, but is well aware that I can't, because my Iaido class only runs once a week - on Tuesdays (that is the day when two 7th Dan Sensei and a 5th Dan Sensei are there, while Saturday only has the 5th Dan Sensei).

In my Iaido dojo it's usually been that one of the 7th Dans (Older Sensei) takes the beginners/intermediate, the 5th Dan takes the advanced group, while the other 7th Dan (Younger Sensei) supervises that group. When I first started we were originally split into three groups, the advanced taken by the Older Sensei, the Intermediate taken by the 5th Dan Sensei, the Beginners taken by a 3rd Dan, and the Younger Sensei supervising the whole thing - but eventually we switched to the two group format.

I have to be honest. I don't learn much from the Older Sensei. He's not that great at teaching. I have a lot of respect for him, but, I don't learn much from him. The comments I get from the Younger Sensei are very good, and very helpful. The problem is, I only get something from him once every three or four weeks. I did most of my learning from the 5th Dan Sensei - which is also one of the reasons I went to the free practice days on Saturdays, as I learnt a lot from him there as well.

Recent developments at the dojo have led to the 5th Dan Sensei leaving. My current training schedule is like this:
Tuesday: Iaido (Formal class)
Friday: Jodo (Formal class)
Saturday: Tai Chi (Formal class)
Sunday: Iaido (Informal class with 5th Dan Sensei - invite only, very small, different location)

So I dumped the Saturday Iaido class because I don't get anything out of it any more besides free training - which can be helpful, but I train enough times a week anyway. I now meet up with the 5th Dan Sensei at a different location on Sunday with one or two other people (no one else in my dojo knows about this), and I continue to learn and train with him.

The Younger Sensei now takes the Advanced class, but it's different - it's still less teaching and more observing and supervising. Which still means, I only get comments from him maybe once every three or four weeks. It's not that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing, it's that he's working with others as well. I still do the majority of my learning from the 5th Dan Sensei (albeit now on Sundays).

Now if I'm not getting very much out of Iaido on Tuesdays (getting something once every three or four weeks), but I'm consistently learning with Jodo on Fridays, and if I went to Jodo on Tuesdays I can guarantee I would be getting just as much out of it as I do on Fridays... At what point does sticking with the formal Iaido training on Tuesdays become stupidity?

It's be different if I didn't want to do the art any more, or if I was getting anything out of the art anymore (and thus not want to do it), but I'm not quitting the art - I'm just not getting anything out of it at that particular training session. Martial arts and the student-teacher relationship are a strange thing. Ordinarily I would never even consider leaving my Sensei. However, none of these people were my original Sensei. He's back in Perth. I am staying at the dojo out of loyalty to the dojo, loyalty to my friends at the dojo and out of loyalty to the Sensei there - this was the dojo I went to when I first came to Seattle. It's a good dojo (or was anyway), I like it there. But I'm not getting much out of training there anymore.

Don't get me wrong, I like all the Sensei there. They are interesting characters, and I respect all of them. And I still learn from the Younger Sensei - but feeling like I'm getting something out of it once every three or four weeks, as opposed to every week? It doesn't help that the Older Sensei has currently taken over the whole class and we're not splitting up into groups at the moment. Last training session I don't think the Younger Sensei did anything but watch - even though he's been here longer. Politeness and customs of Japanese people, I guess.

And if I abandon my friends there - who are also not getting as much out of training as they were when the 5th Dan Sensei was there, but are not training with him (and are unaware that we train on Sundays)... I could help them, but it's not really my place - I am just a 2nd Dan, and have not been granted (nor have I sought) permission to teach.

The measure of a man lies in his actions and his beliefs. I may not have many qualities which can be considered honourable or righteous, but I have always considered myself loyal - it is very hard for me to simply abandon someone or something/someplace. Every time I have left a job it has been hard and I have felt like I have abandoned my old company and workplace. When I left Australia to come to the States, I felt as if I was abandoning my dojo, my friends and my family. My decision to stop training in Seitei Jodo and concentrate on Koryu, due to the lack of Seitei training here, was very hard for me, and it took a lot for me to call up my Sensei back home and talk to him about it. I felt like I was betraying him and what he taught me. He had been expecting the phone call and thought it was a good thing, and beneficial to me and Australia, so that made it better, but it was still tough.

But this time it's different. It's not moving country, or changing jobs for a better opportunity. It's leaving - or "taking a leave of absence from" - the dojo, while people I geniunely like and respect still train there. I'm not stopping training in the art - I'm just no longer training there. At the same time however, isn't continuing training there a disservice to me? If I can improve my Jodo by training on Tuesdays and Fridays, and feel I'm not improving my Iaido by training on Tuesdays, aren't I damaging/limiting my own progression as a martial artist?

So what am I going to do? I will continue to train Iaido on Tuesdays for now. Hopefully we will return to "normal" training soon, and the Younger Sensei will take over the Advanced group again. When that happens, I'll evaluate. If things are different now that he is actually taking us, and I consistently get something out of training every week - even every second week - I will stay. He is, after all, also the 5th Dan's teacher (and I guess, my Sensei in America). But if it continues as it is, even after we return to normal training, then I guess I will "take a leave of absence" from the Dojo to train in Jodo - or to take classes, as the Older Sensei may think I consider Jodo more important that Iaido, which is not true.

But how long will I spend considering? This is not a decision I want to make... Even after I make it I will feel bad about it. It's a decision I'm making which benefits myself, but I still feel as if I am abandoning my dojo and my friends. What is the measure of a man? What is the quality of his honour? The moment a place which has taken me in - a place which I've trained at, a place which has looked after me for over a year, where my friends continue to train - ceases to benefit me, do I cut and run? That was an unfortunate pun, but still... Is that not disloyalty? Is that the quality of my honour?

So, we return to the original question. At what point does loyalty cease to become honourable and turn into stupidity?

Some cool election story links...

2008-11-08T00:51:50Z

Cute kids:
http://www.prospect.org/csnc/blogs/ezraklein_archive?month=11&year=2008&base_name=change_we_can_believe_in_1

Touching story about retired White House butler:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/11/06/AR2008110603948.html?nav=emailpage

It wasn't a dream...

2008-11-05T17:26:12Z

They did it. I've been following this campaign since the beginning, and have been an Obama supporter long before most of my friends decided who they would support - even in the primaries. The US did it. Nice to know I got it right.

Yes we fucking can, motherfuckers.

Weekend Chilling

2008-11-03T18:16:55Z

So it was Halloween on Friday, and for the first time in a long time I didn't have training on Friday night or Saturday morning (well I had iai on Saturday morning, but that one was always voluntary so I chose not to go). Shawn was having a Halloween party which I went to - I hadn't hung out with him and that group of friends for ages, so it was good to see them all. Even managed to get Roy over for a little bit, though he disappeared without saying goodbye - he was only there for like half an hour. I guess that's what happens when you get old.

Though I resist costumes and costume parties normally, it was Halloween... And I didn't do anything for Halloween last year. Unfortunately I only decided that I would go in costume on Wednesday. Which left me to my old defaults: samurai or priest. I also had the clothes I wore for my Michael Corleone in Sicily costume from Mob Night earlier this year. I figured seeing as they had already seen me in my Godfather clothes, I could default to an old faithful.

The prospect of rocking up to training smelling of alcohol and cigarettes didn't appeal to me, and seeing as I've only been to church once since I got here (I know, I need to find a church... it's hard though, I've been to like one church all my life, no church really meets my approval apart from that one...), I figured my acolyte robe would be fine. Priest it was. Luckily I got sick of wearing my robe about three hours in, and retired it to my car - as less than half an hour after that, some drunk bastard bumped one of my friends which meant I was wearing half a cup of beer. Good thing I didn't go as a samurai, because I wouldn't have been able to change out of it as easily, and it definitely would have meant turning up to training smelling like beer.

Saturday I saw the movie Changeling, with Angelina Jolie, directed by Clint Eastwood. It's a good movie. Pretty heavy but, and based on a true story - it's not hard to imagine that cops could be so corrupt and immoral back in those days, but it's still weird to actually see it... It started out a bit slow, only cause I knew the premise, but once they hit the premise it was really good. Just intense. And as an interesting surprise, written by J. Michael Straczynski, of Babylon 5 and various comics writing fame (most currently Thor, one of my favourite books at the moment). The next movie I'm looking forward to is Quantum of Solace.

Sunday was an Iaido demo at the Japanese Cultural Centre... Pretty standard stuff. The Cultural Day they had was quite small but they had a decent number of demos and displays there. I didn't stay for long, wandered around after the demo but left pretty quickly. Met up with Chris in the afternoon who I haven't seen for awhile, we chilled and played some DotA.

We tried the latest AI map, and fuck, have they beefed up the AI. We won the first game vs two insanes but only cause they maxed out really quickly (we were like level 9-10 when they were 21+), and our creeps managed to break into their base, so they kept pulling back to defend their base, giving us a chance to max out. If our creeps hadn't broken through and they kept attacking we would have been screwed. In fact in the next game we were screwed. So we switch out to one insane, one normal. Still screwed. Then switched out to two normals. Still screwed (this time I reckon cause they got good characters). It had been awhile since we had played, and we were trying to figure out if our skills had deteriorated that much... So we switched back to an older AI map (the one we normally played), vs two insanes, and we dominated. Glad to know it wasn't us. Hopefully they balance it a bit more in the next AI map... Either that, or my goal is to be able to beat the new AI map. Damn.

Also, I've been watching The F Word a lot since it finished downloading. Damn you Ramsay, I feel like I am in a permanent state of hunger nowadays!

Weekend Shopping

2008-10-27T21:12:00Z

So I've been shopping the past two weekends, and spent over $300 on clothes and shoes. It's almost like I'm a woman (shut up, Kris). Time to put a stop to that right quick. I've bought pretty much everything I wanted to buy anyway - except some thick socks to use with my winter boots up in Whistler, and maybe some new pants - I keep getting holes in my other ones (shut up, Kris).

Apart from that, I've started playing a Vampire: The Masquerade game run by Kendra. No, it is not LARP. I'm not that... hard core.

Picked up the companion book to Ken Burns' Jazz documentary for $35 + tax. It's a steal at twice the price. Finally started watching the documentary as well (which I had downloaded ages ago). It's really good - I know, you're surprised that the guy who likes jazz likes a documentary about jazz. I will have to pick up the soundtrack to it, seems like a pretty essential collection.

Picked up Lego Batman but haven't played it yet, should be awesome but.

You know you have a problem when the lady at the comic store says "Ok, you're not buying any trades this week - you're finishing the ones you already have first." =( This is almost as bad as the time when the guy in the comic store back in Perth told me I had a problem. =/ Maybe I should start buying less comics? I love reading them and all, but I do spend a lot of money on them... Less money than back in Perth, but I still average $50-75 a week here (and the stacks are larger than I get back home).

Brendan and Kendra have started watching Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares (UK), which has rekindled my cooking show (or rather Gordon Ramsay cooking shows) "fettish" (for lack of a better word, shut up, Kris). Started watching Boiling Point again, and am getting the new seasons of Kitchen Nightmares (I only saw the first two), and The F Word. I think (if I have the money) when I go to the UK (that's not an if, I know I will go there eventually), I will have to check out one of his restaurants.

Speaking of money, how awesome is the US-AUS exchange rate? For me anyway. =D

Nikita, Anh and I have managed to organise Whistler this year. It's gonna be more expensive than last year, as we have more people, and also we booked quite a bit later than last year. Ma asked me how come things are always more expensive when I organise them? It's not true... It's all based on circumstances, I swear! We need like a house or something this time instead of a condo/apartment, because there are a lot more people going... It's not MY fault that that makes it more expensive.

Also, I managed to get hold of some Cherry Ripes thanks to an awesome person at work. Which I accidentally left out last night, and Le promptly stole one. Bastard. He's going to Australia at the end of the month anyway!

In this continuing effort to update my blog on a regular basis, I am running out of things to write.

One more week til we find out who the next POTUS is. If it's McCain, I will seriously consider quitting and moving.

Weekend Nothing

2008-10-13T21:16:16Z

Fuck, it's October already.

What have I done this year? Nothing significant or important...

Didn't do anything interesting this weekend - took time to relax and have a break after my last two weekends (apart from standard Tai Chi and Iaido)... Which means I got nothing done.

Fuck, it's October already.

P.S.
My hot water was broken this morning (building wide apparently), is there anything mankier then the feeling of sitting on a bus on the way to work unshowered? I had a shower at work, but I still feel kind of manky. Well, mankier than normal. =P

P.P.S.
Fuck, it's October already.

Weekend Martial Arts

2008-10-10T20:29:02Z

Just to show that I am a fickle son of a bitch who doesn't know what he wants out of life... Last weekend was the annual PNKF Iaido Seminar and Taikai. Even though it only went for two days... Man, every time I finish a martial arts seminar, I walk away wanting to just study martial arts full time. I've had this feeling all week - it always reinvigorates me when I'm starting to feel complacent about training.

Could my ideal job to be like a music teacher with enough time to do a lot of martial arts? The things I love right now: theatre, symphony, martial arts. And alas, with the costs involved in all three, without my current job I couldn't afford to do them... Ah well - I am what I am.

Oh, I started Chen-Style Tai Chi a few weeks ago. I'm enjoying at the moment, but I don't know if I want to keep doing it...

Pros:

I've wanted to do Chen Tai Chi for a long time, and I'm finally doing it
I'm adding an empty-handed martial art to my curriculum - I do two weapons arts, but no empty handed art til now... Sure, I've dabbled in various forms of Kung Fu before (Shaolin, Praying Mantis, Wing Chun), but none really stuck
It's an internal art, the slow steady movements and focus on internal energy should help my other two martial arts vastly as none of them rely on strength
It's early Saturday morning, which means I can do it right before I go to Saturday Iaido - which means I don't waste like half a day cause I have Iai smack bang in the middle of the day
If I ever go back to Australia or visit Adelaide, I can train with Uncle Wong

Cons:

It's early Saturday morning, which means I don't get to sleep in on the weekends like I normally do (sleeping in being til about 10 for me)
The class schedule changes from season to season - if/when I move into a more advanced class than the beginner's class I'm doing now, there is a high probability that it will clash with the schedule for my other martial arts, and seeing as I've invested 4+ years in them and am still enjoying them (and still have much to learn in them) I'm not willing to give them up yet
It's a third martial art to my already busy schedule of two martial arts - cause, you know, outside of work I'm not busy enough... My life consists of work, martial arts, and whatever free time I can scrounge for myself
It's a third martial art to add to the knowledge of my other two martial arts - that's a lot of knowledge to learn, process and execute well... I still have so much to learn in my other two martial arts, am I really prepared to add a third one to that? And as I said before, I'm not willing to give up any of my other two yet
It's quite different to my other two martial arts - they were kind of related, or similar enough so that improvements in either are immediately beneficial to the other; they are also both Japanese based martial arts so they have similar terminology and concepts... The terminology is different as this is a Chinese martial art, and while the some of (if not all of) the concepts are obviously related, it's harder to see link the techniques/execution as they are so different (though I am 100% sure it will benefit my other martial arts)
If I ever go back to Australia/Perth, there is no one really to train Chen style Tai Chi with

Anyway, I guess I'll finish the beginner's course and see how I feel about it then... Kind of worried about a knowledge overload, maybe I should just concentrate on my current two...

Weekend Music

2008-09-29T17:16:01Z

This weekend was a pretty musical weekend as far as weekends go.

Saturday was the first concert in the series subscription I bought to the Seattle Symphony. The symphony did a performance of the Mahler 8, also known as the "Symphony of a Thousand". This work was amazing. I've never heard the Mahler 8 before, so didn't know what to expect - and it certainly wasn't that! A choral masterpiece, the grand scale of the work was breathtaking.

I just can't describe it... All I know is that the first thing I did when I came home was call Mrs Trebse (my violin teacher back home) to talk to her. It's experiencing pieces like this for the first time which make me regret not ignoring my parents and doing Music/Music Education instead of Software Engineering. I miss being part of a performance - and a work like that... My first instrument was the violin, and I've performed in string ensembles and orchestras for awhile. But when I got to high school, as a music scholarship student it was a requirement for me to join the choir (several choirs actually), and you know, even though I've never had any formal instruction in vocals, I think I would prefer to be in the choir for a work like the Mahler 8 than the orchestra. Hell, if I had to pick between an orchestra and a choir now I think I would go for a choir - not that I dislike the violin, far from it... I dunno, I think I just prefer singing at this point in time.

Not only do I miss being part of a performance but also if I did Music Education... I would love to pass on the experience I just had to a whole new generation of musicians... To share with them a work like that, and to hear their thoughts, what they felt... Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had done what I wanted instead of what was the "right". Sometimes I think (at least at this point in time), no matter what I do my true calling will always be in education. I loved teaching/tutoring when I was in uni, I love stirring up an intellectual debate or discussion to explore other people's views and share knowledge. It's never too late I guess, but I'm enjoying the too money too much at the moment. Ah well.

Sunday was the travelling broadway performance of The Phantom of the Opera. I've seen it performed before in Perth, and it's one of my favourite musicals (Point of No Return has to be one of my favourite songs from musicals... It's just so sexual, so... I want to say raw, but raw is probably the wrong word). A lot of people can never see Phantom live again, because they are always disappointed - let's be honest, no one can beat Michael Crawford and Sarah Brightman as the Phantom and Christine, but you know that, so you don't expect a performance as great as that. It's like My Fair Lady - no one will ever be as good as Rex Harrison, and it's hard for anyone to come close to Julie Andrews, so when you go see a performance of it, you just expect that. It doesn't make the show any less enjoyable. This is just my opinion anyway.

The show was pretty good. The guy who played the Phantom was excellent. Not Michael Crawford of course, but still fantastic (only cast member to get a standing ovation by the entire audience). The girl who played Christine... She did a good job in the second half when her range was lower, but in the first half... Man, she needs to HIT the note, not SEARCH for the note. And way, waaaaay too much vibrato in her singing (is vibrato the right term for vocals?)... The duet with Meg (Angel of Music) was by far the worst performance in the show. Meg was flat the entire time, on the high notes Christine was scrambling around like a virgin trying to find the right place to nail it. Not to mention the vibrato nightmare. I'm glad she picked up her game in the second half, which was thoroughly more enjoyable than the first.

That being said, being the Sunday night performance, they used understudies/alts instead of the main performers - Christine was an alt, and, I guess it showed. I still enjoyed the show, I just wish we had gone on a night where the main actress was playing Christine. The guy who played Raoul was pretty good, but I felt he was lowering the part too much. I know Raoul is meant to be a baritone/tenor, but the guy was singing very much in the lower baritone scales - he sounded better on the rare occasions he went to tenor. Standout performance was by far the Phantom, and Firmin and Andre didn't do a bad job either.

Again, it's shows like this which make me miss being part of a performance... For all the worry about mistakes you can make etc (which I worried about a lot when I was performing in school), the rush you get... I would love to be part of musicals again... Just another to make me regret doing engineering instead of music or music education. To introduce people to these great musicals... I owe a lot to my parents who took me to performances like Phantom and Les Mis back in Perth, and to my music teachers, Mrs Trebse, Miss Bird, Mr McMillan for leading me through this world, introducing me to all sorts of different music and musicals - I think they (my music teachers), more than any other people besides my parents, really shaped me into the person I am today. I guess I wish I could be that person to a new generation of people, like they were to me.

Ah well.

Hmmmm...

2008-09-08T16:25:02Z

Hmmmm...

Three Monkeys

2008-07-29T06:17:44Z

Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil. How I managed to get that monkey look down pat is beyond me.

OMG UPDATE!!!11!! My one year anniversary.

2008-07-25T00:40:39Z

How meaningless and unworthwhile (is that even a word? Too bad, I'm using it...) can I make this post?

I should do a Joey post.

"Stuff. Life. Blah. Alive." The end.

So as of three days ago (21st of July) I have officially been in Seattle a year. Can you believe (the majority of) you guys have spent a year without me? I know, it's tragic - how have you gone on with your lives?? Quite happily probably. Here's to another year (or more) before you have to put up with me again.

Have I enjoyed it here so far? Well, here and there. It's been life. It's different. It's a change. Change is a good thing.

Do I regret moving from Perth? Not for a second. Seattle is a beautiful city (except the weather can get grating... Cloudy? Rainy? That's not winter, that's Seattle), and there's so much more to do here (well the kinds of things I would do. Musicals. Symphony. Fine dining. You know - snobby shit).

Do I enjoy my new job? A lot more than my old job. Those who worked with me at my old job will tell you that's not hard but.

Do I miss my friends and family? Sure, but I've made a bunch of new friends (was there ever any doubt?) and I've even brought some old friends from home over (let's be honest, I just brought them over for the money - a quick call to homeland security after I get paid will fix the "pleasure" of their company).

Have I changed since I left Perth? I don't know. Yes and no? I'm sure Jono and Sylvia will be able to tell you when they get home from their visit. Certainly some of my friends here are the kind of people I never thought I'd be hanging out with back home (a surfer dude? Really? He's a huge geek but, so that might explain it!), and I hang out in bars a lot more than I did back home (does that really come as a surprise to anyone?).

So am I going to stay? For awhile at least. There's still stuff I want to do here - travel around the US (and let's face it, the northern hemisphere) is easier from here. I've just had my H1-B visa approved (which will allow me to transfer to a green card, as opposed to my current E-3), so there's that consideration too. I just feel that there's more opportunities etc for me here than there is back home. So I guess, my current plan of record hasn't changed from last time (just the circumstances of visa). Ride out this visa. Renew (or in this case transfer). Finish that visa. Then... See how I feel then.

Do I want to stay? Do I want to go? If I decide to go, what are the chances of me going back to Australia? Probably pretty slim... I'm thinking Europe. Or Asia. I've done Australia. I haven't done those places yet. My mother has a feeling that I may end up in London in the future - I have a feeling she may be right. And I'm thinking of buying a house or condo here. My birthday is coming up in a little over a month, and I'll be a year a way from living a quarter century. I'm getting on in life (yeah, that's right you old bastards!) - and I have the white hairs to prove it now - time to stop fucking around with my money, and time to start doing something with it.

For those kay poh chee out there (mostly my family, blood or honorary) - no, I don't have a girlfriend yet. I'm in no rush. I want a family eventually sure (that's if I don't ultimately end up deciding to become a priest - yes, that's still an option), but I don't even know what I want to do in two years, let alone ten.

Mum's been here for the last month or so (she's visiting for 6 weeks, I think she's been here for about 4 so far) and that's been good. My apartment - very much a bachelor pad - has started to feel like a home - there are people over pretty much every night eating dinner together and just bumming around. It feels like I've found a Seattle family - I jokingly call those who are over the most my mum's new adopted sons (Le and Kris) and daughters (Meghan and Anh). And I've noticed Anh has very similar reactions to my mother, so she's become my second mum - much to her annoyance.

It's going to be a bit strange once she leaves, my apartment will be empty again and it'll just be me. On one hand I'm glad, because I'll get some personal space again (I have had no real alone time in the past 4 weeks, I've gone to the bar to escape, but there's nowhere, really, for alone time), but on the other hand, it's going to be lonely. It took me awhile to get used to living with my mum again, but it's quite happily become a family feel again - and I'm going to have to adjust to not having that again when she leaves. Such is life. Maybe I should get a dog to keep me company. Basset Hound!!!!

When am I coming back to Australia (even for a holiday)? I don't know. I don't have any desire to go back really - except to see friends and family. And it's expensive to go back. And there are other places that are closer which I haven't been to before (Europe, Asia, the rest of America). We'll see how it goes. You should come here. I've seen Australia. You haven't seen Seattle. I'm just saying.

And I guess... That's that. I'm going to go out and buy a PS3 to fill the hole in my life once mum leaves I think! =D Well that's my excuse anyway. And an iPhone.

Til next time.

P.S.
THE DARK KNIGHT IS TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!! I'm just saying.